When You’re Done, You Know It: How I Know I’m Done Having Babies

Done having babies

I’m done having babies.  There, I said it.  Before you give me the “but, you’re so young” or “you’ll change your mind” lecture, stop right there.  Trust me, my mind is made up.  I’m done having babies.  When you’re done, you just know it.

Growing up, I always imagined myself having a big family.  I thought I wanted 4 or 5 kids.  I’m 1 of 3 kids, and so is my husband.  Naturally, I thought we’d have more than 2 kids.  But now that my 2 perfect babies are here, I feel 100% complete.  I get that other women don’t feel the same way – I can totally relate, as I didn’t feel 100% complete after having my first.  But now that I have two, I know I’m done.

How I Know I'm Done Having Babies
My perfect family of four.

I am not sad.  I thought I would be.  I have always wanted to be a mother and I have always loved babies.  Just because I know I’m done having babies of my own, doesn’t mean any of this has changed.  I still love being a mom.  I mean truly, I love it.  I’m the mom who actually enjoys getting down on the floor to play Candyland with my preschooler.  I also still love babies.  To all of my friends planning to have more babies in the future, I can’t wait to spoil and snuggle them!

In this moment, with my own 2 babies, I’m soaking in everything about them.  I want to remember their little voices as they’re learning to talk.  I want to remember the way their hair smells as I cuddle them after a bath.  I want to remember the way they look at me in the morning, with huge gummy smiles on their faces.  If I were to add another baby into the mix, I’m not sure I’d have enough time and attention to remember all of these little details.  I know lots of mothers who are capable of this, and I think they are amazing human beings!  I just know myself, and I know that I can get overwhelmed very quickly.

To anyone reading this and isn’t connecting with what I am saying, I have news for you: you’re probably not done having babies.  You might be on the fence about it (and that’s okay!), but you should probably wait before making any permanent decisions.  For those of you totally getting where I’m coming from, congratulations!  It is such a great feeling to know that you are done having babies. 

How I Know I'm Done Having Babies

21 thoughts on “When You’re Done, You Know It: How I Know I’m Done Having Babies

  1. I think it’s great that you know you are done! And its always strange that other people think they know you better than you know yourself. I’d love, love, love to have more kids (I always wanted 3-4), but don’t think it will happen due to some medical issues.

    1. Your girls are beautiful, Danielle! I’m a strong believer that everything happens for a reason. Enjoy your time with your girls, mama! <3

  2. I love this! I have one and some days I feel complete but others I just know I want at least one more. I think I’ll be done for sure after our next…just a matter of getting there ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. What a cool post! I just had my second baby and am always asked if I’m done – since I don’t know for sure, mayb e you’re right and I’m not done : )

  4. I think it’s great that you know this for yourself. I too thought I was done at two. I never imagined having any more than that. I had my boy and my girl and it was perfect. Then I accidentally got pregnant and miscarried. Following that loss, I realized I wasn’t done after all. We tried for a third, lost another and finally had our last baby girl. Now, my family feels 100 percent complete. I had my tubes tied during my last c-section and haven’t looked back! When you know, you just know.

  5. I have heard this from so many of my friends who say that they “just knew”. I’m still waiting for that resounding feeling of “done-ness” myself. I think that’s great that you feel so perfectly at peace with it and you’re not feeling pressure to stick with your original large family plan! There is no perfect family size, just what’s perfect for your family!

  6. I’m nervous because even though my second pregnancy was terrible (and my newborn was terrible until she was a year), I still can’t definitively say “I’m done” LOL! I wish I could say it!

  7. I wrote a blog about the last baby sadness because I didn’t feel sad etc and I for a fact THOUGHT we were done. My husband had a vasectomy scheduled after we had our 5th baby and as we got closer and closer to the date he expressed how he didn’t feel like it was the right time. He cancelled the appointment and we talked about it and both felt a bit of relief that we were on the same page. So now we are giving it a year to truly decide if we are going to have One last baby to make it even or if we are done making little monsters.

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